This Week In Film (3/29/2021 - 4/4/2021)

March 29, 2021 - April 4, 2021

Hello readers. Born in 1982, I was a 90’s teen. For me, my sacred ritual was the weekly rotation of video stores. There was no Blockbuster, but there was Box TV, LTD, Spotlight, Music Unlimited, and one other I always forget the name of. From junior high on, I’d walk the rotation of stores. On Tuesdays I rented new releases from Box TV, LTD, and Music Unlimited. For the weekend I’d rent the 4 X 4 from Spotlight which was four movies, four days, and four dollars. It’s not an exaggeration that I usually had up to 10 tapes rented at any given time. And I recently mapped out the walk on Google Maps, it was 2 miles to hit all the stores. But that was a small price for my passion.

Freshman year of High School was 1996 for me. It was the same year Scream came out. I was 14 and I was livid. I didn't have a certain clique at school, so I floated from table to table during lunch. I kept hearing 'experts' talking about slasher movie rules. They had all been spoon fed the CliffsNotes, while I had clocked in all the hours and walked countless miles seeking out new horror media. That's when it occurred to me, revenge was easy. All I had to do was school some Randy Meeks regurgitating idiot on the films Scream referenced. Nobody was impressed when I said Casey Becker hanging from the tree was reminiscent of the first death in Suspiria. No one knew Tatum was referencing I Spit On Your Grave. The phone calls come from When A Stranger Calls. Nothing but tumbleweeds and dust. I could hear the hollow space in their head whistling with the wind. Okay, it wasn't that dramatic, but I realized there was no one around with my level of love for cinema. None of my friends were renting 2001: A Space Odyssey week after week until they could become comfortable with their own interpretation. So I tried to educate them. I forced each one of them through Dawn Of The Dead, Friday the 13th marathons, Clockwork Orange and countless others. Their minds were blown, but that was all. I couldn’t create someone to discuss movies with, no matter how hard I tried.

I knew all my life that I had to get out of my small town. This was the just that last thing - that thing that solidifies every decision in life. So I went to film school. I met a group of people that were all very passionate about varying forms of media. People who blew my mind. A group that are still relevant in my life twenty years later. In case you're reading this and you are one of those people, I really love you. But that's not what I came here to tell you about...

This Week In Film where I create a weekly rundown of the random sh*t I watch. There’s a HIGH / LOW at the end of this entry, so if words aren't really your thing, you can scroll quickly, look at pictures, and skip to my favorite viewings of the week.

Lets begin...

OVERVIEW:

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3 WOMEN (1977)

dir: Robert Altman

After his run of success with The Long Goodbye (1973), Thieves Like Us (1974), California Split (1974), and Nashville (1975) 20th Century Fox took a chance on Altman's newest endeavor. Well, really it was still the smash success of MASH (1970) and Altman's ability to stay within his budgets that allowed a vanity project funding. 3 Women was based on a dream Altman had while he stayed with his wife in the hospital. He was afraid of his wife dying and the vivid nightmares of identity theft plagued him. Using his dreams, knowing he wanted Shelley Duvall and Sissy Spacek, and borrowing from Ingmar Bergman's Persona (1966) he was ready to go.

"Don't look now, but it's thoroughly modern Millie making her grand entrance."

From the first frame, we get this feeling that something is very wrong with Mildred "Pinky" Rose (Sissy Spacek). One through her child-like actions, and two through the musical cues that surround her. While Pinky disturbs us, Mildred "Millie" Lammoreaux (Shelley Duvall) appears overly confident. We quickly learn that Millie's confidence is only a coping mechanism for her loneliness. Pinky becomes obsessed with her new friend and soon moves in with Millie. As roommates, Millie dominates every aspect of their living. Millie shows Pinky her small, sad world. A new character comes into the film, Willie, who is a pregnant artist that co-owns Millie's favorite bar on the edge of town. Willie's cheating husband lights the fuse of a whole new film. Just as we think we are getting the hang of Altman's vision, near-death derails the film we were watching, and a new film takes its place. It's way more subtle than it sounds. David Lynch's Lost Highway (1997) takes a hard left with brakes squealing into it's second half. 3 Women would be a soft turn on a pleasant morning without traffic.

Altman has said the characters in the film are empty vessels in an empty landscape. Pinky, Millie, and Willie are all three the persona of one individual weaving in and out of each vessel. Pinky becomes like Millie, Millie becomes like Pinky, and Millie becomes like Willie. Pinky denounces her old life, revokes her parents, and gives up her nickname. Millie is forced into a timid state while Pinky is coming into her power. But a grand nightmare reverts Pinky into her child-like role once again. When the three women share a space and tragedy, they become three generations of the same person. In the end we see grandmother Willie, mother Millie, and daughter Pinky sharing their lives together. Like a Lynch film, it's better to let the psychoanalysis wash over you while you're watching.

HIGH SCHOOL U.S.A. (1983)

dir: Rod Amateau

This 1983 made-for-TV movie is not good. Not even bad-good the way that the ABC after school specials were. With titles like My Dad Lives in a Downtown Hotel (1973), It Must Be Love, 'Cause I Feel So Dumb (1975), Reading, Writing and Reefer (1979), Have You Ever Been Ashamed of Your Parents? (1983) these TV movies were still better than the attempt at high school comedy we see in High School USA. Maybe that's a bit harsh, but I had high hopes for this one. The senior class includes Michael J. Fox before he became Marty McFly, Nancy McKeon from The Facts Of Life, Todd Bridges from Diff'rent Strokes, Anthony Edwards before he became a Tri Lamda nerd, and Crispin Glover before he became George McFly and America's favorite weirdo. With such a great cast, what went wrong?

Anthony Edwards is Beau Middleton, the kid with everything. He's wealthy, powerful, possesses a few minions, and is wanted by every 'girl' in school. So why does his girlfriend keep hanging out with that loser J.J. Manners? Speaking of J.J., he runs with the fellow losers of the school, and they're getting tired of Beau controlling everyone. So J.J. must devise a plan to dethrone the king and date the king's girlfriend. With the help of his loser friends, J.J. might achieve the impossible. In the hands of Bob Clark and not made-for-TV, this would have been a classic. Instead we have a director who would later create a film so bad, it never leaves the worst-of lists: The Garbage Pail Kids Movie (1987).

Say something nice. It's 1983 and people of color aren't treated well / represented well in TV and film. This is the broad generalization. But for some reason, High School USA is an exception. J.J. Manners only has one close friend, and that is Otto Lipton (Todd Bridges). While Otto is the only black kid seen in the film and this lends itself to the token black character trope, he is shown as the smartest kid in school. Otto builds a robot that listens for auditory commands. Otto wears a shirt with Einstein on it, explains his 200 IQ, and is working toward a career at NASA. Otto builds the car that wins the race and dethrones the old Reich. If we take J.J. out of the equation, and Otto is our lead, he single-handedly reduces the white suburban elitist to nothing. That's a way better ending then J.J. getting a date.

THE FATHER (2020)

dir: Florian Zeller

Castle Rock season 1 episode 7 titled, "The Queen." This episode focuses on Ruth Deaver (Sissy Spacek), who suffers from Early Onset Alzheimer's. The whole episode is from Ruth's perspective. In a show like Castle Rock, the creators wanted to make sure that Ruth wasn't written off as just an elderly character with a disease. They decided to throw the audience into her world. Ruth's dementia attacks her with memories, turning her home into a memory palace where she moves through rooms into different eras of her life. There is no rhyme or reason to which memory she enters or leaves. The key throughout the episode is that Ruth has totems lying around the house, chess pieces that allow her to distinguish memory from reality. These are her coping mechanisms until they betray her.

Having experienced the brilliance of Sissy Spacek's performance in an hour-long horror drama, prepares you for Anthony Hopkins masterclass in dementia. Had I not seen "The Queen" it would have taken a little longer to figure out what the filmmaker's were showing us. While Anthony (Hopkins) moves through memories and times in his life, there's an added element of someone with dementia misremembering faces. Anthony walks from one time period to another he sees his daughter (Olivia Coleman), his daughter's husband, and his caretaker who are played by varying actors. There are moments where the rug is pulled from under your feet and sequences that sculpt you into a mess of tears. But all the while, we focus on Hopkins, who hasn't shined this bright in years. If only he could find his damn watch, maybe he'd have a totem to help him differentiate time from memory.

 

GODZILLA VS KONG (2021)

dir: Adam Wingard

Who would have thought that the scrappy filmmaker who made Pop Skull in 2007 would one day reign over Hollywood? I've followed Wingard's career since 2007 and have championed his rise ever since. I wrote a piece on what I called The Next Wave filmmakers, but other writers named them the 'MumbleGore' group and while it annoyed me, at least these creators have been recognized. I wanted to look at this group of creatives in the same way we see French New Wave, Italian New Wave, or German New Wave filmmakers. But because they are from horror and mumblecore roots, critics like to cheapen their achievements.

In the beginning... Wingard made a film with his best friend E.L. Katz (who went on to make Cheap Thrills (2013)), and to raise extra funds, Wingard wrote an article for Fangoria. He set out to cover a film called Dead Birds (2004) where he met Simon Barrett. This group along with another of Wingard's friends, Lane Hughes, developed Pop Skull. With Wingard's sophomore film, he got into the festival circuit. This is where he met Joe Swanberg, but lets be honest, this is where everyone met Joe Swanberg. This lead to Barrett, Wingard, Katz, and Swanberg making A Horrible Way To Die (2010). Here, AJ Bowen and Amy Seimetz were introduced into the evolving clique. Joe then asked if Wingard wanted to spend a year living with him. And during that year they created five films while prepping larger productions. These films included collaborations with Kentucker Audley, Kate Lyn Sheil, and Ti West. You're Next (2011) became Wingard's greatest calling card. And it was all possible because of this troupe that had been created with actors, actresses, directors, writers, and producers.

In the decade since You're Next, Wingard has steadily climbed the ranks on larger productions. But Godzilla Vs. Kong is his largest undertaking yet. It hasn't been an easy one either. With the underwhelming nature of Godzilla: King Of The Monsters, it was difficult to see if this latest resurgence of Godzilla would continue. Wingard took notes on what didn't work in King Of The Monsters, namely Kyle Chandler and too many creatures we didn't give a sh*t about. We see Chandler maybe a total of seven times, which thankfully reduces the number of total lines he has to speak. And we focus on the two beasts we've grown to love: King Kong and Godzilla. This film is a fanboy dream come true. The special effects and CGI work. They show the beasts in the light of day like they did in Kong: Skull Island and, we can see their detail. This is everything you could want in a film called Godzilla vs. Kong made by a filmmaker who feels the passion of genre cinema deep in his core, and every frame and every needledrop reveals it.

Oh, and thank you to IMDB who put their foot down. If you don't know the stupidity, those Snyderverse addicts bombarded IMDB with 1-star reviews of Godzilla vs. Kong because of a press statement that told them there would be no more films in the Snyderverse. Upon hearing this news, they got so amped up, they trolled a film that had yet to be released with reviews that simply said: We need more Snyder films, complete the Snyder vision. No worries, IMDB stepped in and cleaned house. They removed every review that was irrelevant. What a weird fan-service world we live in.

I've watched GvK three times this week and in honor of my appreciation for Adam Wingard, I kept the movie playing on repeat on HBOMax all weekend long.

 

APRIL FOOL'S DAY (1986)

dir: Fred Walton

This late era slasher film made me so mad back in the day. I was upset by the lack of kills on screen. I was upset with knowing the 'killer' too soon. And finally, I was upset by the ending. If you've seen it, you know what I mean. Director Fred Walton whose previous horror film, When A Stranger Calls (1979) is almost as divisive. Maybe that's what he went for. To subvert your expectations. Unfortunately in 1986 Jason was coming back with Friday The 13th VI: Jason Lives, Freddy was in production with Dream Warriors, and the slasher cycle was dying. The titans of slasher films would prevail for another decade, while your killer-of-the week slasher films were gasping a death rattle.

Muffy St. John (Deborah Foreman) invites college friends to her fancy house on an island. A house she will soon inherit when she turns 21. As soon as our bevy of walking archetypes show up, its all April Fool's Day fun and pranks, until its not. Besides Foreman from Valley Girl (1983), the slasher fodder is rounded out by Deborah Goodrich from Just One of the Guys (1985), Biff Tannen (Thomas Wilson) from Back To The Future (1985), and America's favorite Final Girl Ginny (Amy Steel) from Friday The 13th 2 (1981).

April Fool's Day has a second life. Shout! Factory, the Criterion label for all things niche has put out a collector's edition of the film. Reviews are in, and people forgive the ending. They've also come to embrace it as a novel choice. I think, had the world know the slasher would be dead after this film, audiences would have loved it in 1986. It is a perfect farewell to an era.

THE BIRD WITH THE CRYSTAL PLUMAGE (1970)

dir: Dario Argento

"Bring in the perverts!"

It used to be that when I thought of Argento's feature debut, I aligned it with a maestro utilizing beautiful notes he'd heard from past concerts. A Hitchcock here and a Howard Hawks there. I dove into the symbolism of the man caught in a glass cage and forced to watch a murder take place. I thought of Bava's The Girl Who Knew Too Much (1963) and how an entire cycle of films - Giallo in particular - that were created with amateur sleuths that always know more than authority figures. Where once I was in awe of Argento's brilliant beginning to his 'Animal Trilogy,' now all I can think of is my wife constantly misremembering this film.

We go through our questions every time. "Is it the one with the painting?" Yes, it has the painting of the woman being killed in the snow. "The one with the mirror?" No, Deep Red (1975) has the mirror. "The one with the guy trapped in the glass.." Yes. "...And the musician seeing the woman get murdered?" No. "Okay, the one with Daria as the reporter and the crystal figurine murder?" At this point, I fall for it. No, Daria's in Deep Red and the figurine is in Bird. "Oh, the figurine of a bird with crystal-like..." When she starts laughing at me, I leave the room. I think she genuinely gets them confused and when she figures out which is which, that's when she sees how long she can keep the game going.

The point of this game is that she's right. The plot and characters can sometimes be interchangeable in Giallo films and even within Argento's own oeuvre. But that's what makes the kills so damn enjoyable. You may know the generics of the story, but you have no idea how he's gonna pull off his murders. And murder as an art-form is why you watch early Argento. Why do you watch new Dario Argento? Hope. That's why. You hope for a day when you can say, "I saw that new Argento film and holy sh*t!"

KILLER PARTY (1986)

dir: William Fruet

Well 1986 sure had a run on April Fool's Day movies. With Slaughter High (1985), April Fool's Day (1986), and Killer Party you have a perfect triple feature for the day of pranks. This was my first time sitting through Killer Party and actually paying attention. It's good, not great by any means, but good. The story feels so uneven. Almost all the kills happen in the last quarter of the film, and they happen at a breakneck pace. We have characters who appear to enter the film way later or way earlier than they are supposed to. Some scenes feel like the editor forgot to put them in and chooses to insert them randomly later. But there is fun to be had. B-movie Maker Fruet of Funeral Home (1980), Spasms (1983), and Blue Monkey (1987) gives Killer Party an inviting atmosphere. The intro is a double fake-out. It goes nowhere but does show a funny funeral featuring a flamboyant father quoting Wizard Of Oz followed by a drive-in theater music video for White Sister's "You're No Fool." The song lyrics actually include, "April, why do you play the fool?" Once that nonsense is dispatched, our film starts.

The atmosphere occurs by using rush week at a college campus, and the three pledging sisters riding bikes along fraternity row. We get Paul Bartel as a pretentious college professor. We get a prank pulled on the sorority sisters by the frat guys that includes nudity, a hot tub, and bees. There's a killer in a diving bell, and did I mention there's a demon possessing people? Yes, Killer Party has it all. There's no gore, and the kills are too quick. But there is something charming about how ineptly the story is handled.

 

PALM SPRINGS (2020)

dir: Max Barbakow

Infinite time loop films: 12:01 (1993), Edge of Tomorrow (2014), The Endless (2017), The Final Girls (2015), Groundhog Day (1993), Happy Death Day series, and The Map of Tiny Perfect Things (2021). There are a few more, but these are more well known with Bill Murray's foray being at the top of the list. While some are about survival or finding out who the murderer is, each of these films toy with the concept of existence itself. The Endless is definitely the most cerebral in this category, but Palm Springs doesn't shy away from asking the big questions. What is the point of life whether it is infinite or finite? Either way it doesn't matter. When one is faced with the question to choose a time loop or a normal life, go for the damn time loop - every time.

The wife and I both are on the same page with Andy Samberg's level of attractiveness. He cute. The older he gets, the better looking. But if he were to stay the same age forever what would he do with his looks and charm? Well, he'd try to have sex with all the members of a wedding party and fall for a fellow misanthrope. The beauty of Barbakow's film is that when it starts we are already in the loop. This allows us later to find out that Nyles (Andy Samberg) - whose name phonetically resembles the word nihilist which makes total sense - has lost all concept of time. Nyles doesn't know how long he's been in the loop. It could be years, weeks, or decades. He's committed suicide countless times. He's tried to stay awake as long as possible. He's re-entered the cave. And after attempting to get out of the loop or die trying, he has relaxed into the idea of infinity. He knows nothing matters, but along the way he's built an ethical code. He can do no harm to others. Because even though they might not remember, he'll have to carry that sh*t forever. Even the ethics of infinity serve narcissism. With the profound relief of nihilism floating with Nyles in the pool every day, he meets a fellow looper... er, no, that's a Rain Johnson term. A 'time is a flat circle' cohort. Nope. Whatever we call the re-occurrence, Sarah (Cristin Milioti) now shares infinity with him. Hijinks and making light of the nothingness we all swim in ensues.

2021 ACADEMY AWARD NOMINATED SHORTS

dir: Various

Yes, People (Gísli Darri Halldórsson), Animation short. People living in a tenement in their various mundane routines. The only word uttered in the film is, "Yes," but used in nearly every variation one can conceive showing the humar, passion, dispare, and boredome of everyday living.

Genius Loci (Adrien Merigeau), Animation short. Breathes new life into the artform. Every frame painted with blending watercolors that provide texture to the chaos of the character's inner mind. I've never seen animation that switches between pure minimalist to humans catching on fire and transforming into dogs. Existential watercolors? Yes please.

Burrow (Madeline Sharafian), Animation short. A timid bunny just wants to build his dream home but after seeing a mole’s and a mouse’s elaborate plans, he gets too self-conscious. This forces the bunny to frantically find a spot of their own. We see as the bunny invades everyone's homes by accident, but they are always met with pleasantries. Only after the bunny causes an accident, do they ask for help. And the bunny receives more help then they could have ever dreamed. Coming in at five and a half minutes, super cute.

Opera (Erick Oh), Animation short. Remarkable. Like in that, I have no idea what I just watched, but every fiber in me is screaming, "Yes!" One continuous take and hundreds of tiny details. You could continuously loop this eight minute film for days and still find details you've missed. There is no straight narrative. You see the pyramid of life. At the top there's a key hole and at the bottom there's a key. In between, servants of both sides live to serve the top of the pyramid. On the high left there's marriage and on the high right there's death, but all of it serves a all consuming figure who acts as gatekeeper of the lock. Or, I have no idea what I'm talking about and this short is better served without explanations.

Colette (Anthony Giacchino), Documentary short. This film focuses on Colette, a member of the French Resistance during WWII who returns after many years to the Nordhausen, Germany concentration camp. When asked what it felt like being in the resistance Colette answers, "When it's your turn to live through a war, you'll realizes there's no time for feeling." Colette Marin-Catherine is 90 years old and decides to confront old memories with the assistance of a history student who has decided to research the life of Colette's brother Jean-Pierre. Together they walk the grounds were 20,000 died, including Colette's brother. This short film will break you. In the same way Colette states she hasn't cried in years but comes to tears when realizing she didn't bring flowers to the site of her brother's death. And if your tough facade doesn't crumble by this point, then maybe a few moments later when Colette says, "If these hills could talk, I think we'd hear screams." A very powerful 25 minutes.

A Concerto Is a Conversation (Ben Proudfoot, Kris Bowers), Documentary short. Kris Bowers scored The Green Book (2018). Here, he interviews his grandfather Horace Bowers on life growing up in the south and being a man living in Los Angeles. Kris, even as accomplished as he is, feels as a minority composer there are places he isn't supposed to be. This allows for a conversation with Grandpa on the Jim Crow South and how in Los Angeles racism took another form. Horace found ways around the racism to thrive. He learned if he didn't show his face and handled his affairs through the mail anything could be accomplished. The doc moves away from this and focuses on how Horace is proud of Kris. And believe me, as a boy who recently lost his father, these are the words most needed in life.

Do Not Split (Anders Hammer), Documentary short. What seems to begin as proposed law allowing the Chinese government the ability to extradite criminals to mainland China erupts into a protests lasting from late 2019 to today. Chants of, "Liberate Hong Kong, Revolution of our times," are heard from the thousands protesting. We are thrown into this world of chaos. One that begins with protesters firebombing a bank and moves toward barricading a university campus, to protecting themselves with Molotov cocktails. The 5 demands: No extradition to China, No impunity for police brutality, No prosecution of protestors, No rigged elections by Beijing, and No riot labeling are met with officials pushing for anti-mask laws. These are meant to deter protestors. Ultimately, a new security law that allows widespread criminal arrests is passed. And then COVID hit and the demonstrations were paused. The situation is in limbo and will be for the foreseeable future. This is a wild 30 minute ride through the chaos.

Feeling Through (Doug Roland), Narrative short. A homeless youth decides to help a blind and deaf man navigate a few city streets. In doing so, of course he learns a lot about himself. While the film's meanings are overt, they're still palpable. Side note: Robert Tarango who plays Artie is cinema's first blind and deaf actor.

The Letter Room (Elvira Lind), Narrative Short. Oscar Isaac is Richard who works at a prison and has just been promoted to Director of Communications. This means he is in charge of reviewing every piece of mail coming in and going out for the prisoners. While scanning through the letters, he finds beautifully written words for a man on death row. This relationship between a woman on the outside and a man waiting to die piques Richard's interest and pushes him to dive deeper. Oscar Isaac and Elvira Lind have been married since 2017 and this shows in the film. Isaac provides a subtle performance here, one only a wife could elicit. It would be easy to see this as a feature film as each scene is filled with a density that we only capture the surface of.

Two Distant Strangers (Travon Free, Martin Desmond Roe), Narrative Short. A 32 minute panic attack. One that places you inside the victim. For 32 minutes we are George Floyd, Breonna Taylor, and Rayshard Brooks to name only a few of the ever growing list of #SayTheirNames. In an interview with REVOLT, Free states, "The film was born out of the repetition of seeing stories about Black people who were being killed by the police over and over again. And having to relive the outrage, and the sadness, and the grief, and then the acceptance of those events over and over again." The film utilizes Carter (Joey Bada$$) as a vessel through which real life tragedies perpetrated by police are represented. By using the time-loop concept, Carter is murdered by police in all the unsettling ways that have taken place in reality. The sentiment of the struggle is to never give up and always persist. There is never a point where Carter accepts his murder as his fate. It is this persistence that will always prevail in the face of injustice.

 

HAPPILY (2021)

dir: BenDavid Grabinski

I'm going to tread lightly. The less you know the better. I know critics say that so they don't have to actually write about the film, but in this case I don't want to be the reason that you know too much going into it. I will recommend it. I will say that it's not a horror film, it's not a drama, it's not sci-fi. And while these elements exist peripherally, there is no genre you can easily squeeze it into. Joel McHale plays it straight but we do get comedy from Charlyne Yi, Paul Scheer, and a great supporting performance from Natalie Morales.

The basic setup. Tom (McHale) and Janet (Kerry Bishé) have been married fourteen years, and their love-life is just as spicy as it was when they met. This pisses off their friends. No one likes their love, and they are vocal about it. Tom and Janet are made to feel as though their love is not normal. On a couples trip to an AirBnb, five couples come together, but nothing is as it seems. I know. Saying, "Nothing is as it seems," feels like a voice-over for the trailer. It feels like lazy writing. I don't want to spoil the surprise, but I'll also say there is nothing to spoil. Chew on that ambiguity.

NIGHT OF THE LEPUS (1972)

dir: William Claxton

Full review for our Retro Flashback periodic series here. I really love the horrible job this movie does at trying to force perspective. And the gallons of ketchup used as blood is very charming. I remember that when I was young, my public library had maybe five or six horror films including Night of the Lepus. These films ended up on a constant rotation. I think Kingdom of the Spiders (1977) was another one. I'm guessing that's why I have a soft spot for Nature Vs. Man horror. The original War of the Worlds (1953) was another one. This made for a well-rounded education. On one end, man ruins nature, and nature fights back; on the other end man has ruined a planet to the extent that an alien species can't even survive. I remember the moment when I finally understood the ramifications of humanity's survival at the end of War of the Worlds, I felt physically ill.

In case you don't read the long write-up because it's... long. I'll quote myself. As a side note, one of my favorite moments of Noah Baumbach's Kicking and Screaming (1995) is when Eric Stoltz - lifetime student - says, "I may be quoting myself here.." Anyway, while researching the Retro Flashback article, I came across the fact that the original title of the film was to be Rabbits. MGM was scared that audiences wouldn't find rabbits scary, so they called it Night of the Lepus and created a poster that showed dozens of eyes. They were banking on the fact that audiences were stupid and wouldn't know what Lepus meant. But, seriously, my question remains: if they were concerned that rabbits wouldn't be scary in a horror film, why did they make a horror film about rabbits in the first place? Either way, now we have an easy choice for an Easter tradition. Shout out to Shudder (horror streaming service) that dropped this onto their platform just in time for resurrection-bunny day.

CRITTERS 2: THE MAIN COURSE (1988)

dir: Mick Garris

Brad Brown is back in town. It's Easter weekend and those aren't your usual eggs that you're decorating. Nope, they're a box of Crite eggs that have been sitting in a nice cool barn for two years. Sure, grab them and let them sit in the sun or near a heat source. We'll just see what happens.

Besides Brad's big return to Grover's Bend, we get Sheriff Harv and Sal from the first film, and of course we get the bounty hunters, and yes those 'space porcupine things.' Charlie McFadden (Don Keith Opper) returns not only to the film but to Earth. And I think we can all agree that Critters tells the hero's journey of Charlie. You see, Charlie was a former baseball player turned alcoholic who was promoted to space bounty hunter and eventually becomes a small town sheriff. This is only the second film, he's in two more. He's a cameo hero in Critters 3 and is lost in space in Critters 4 where he's been in cryogenics for 50 years. With everyone from his past dead and any knowledge of him being a total f*ckup gone, Charlie McFadden finally sees a bright future for himself in 2045.

"You better hurry ladies, resurrection's in 45 minutes."

Garris goes the comedic route and it pays off. He throws in a few meta references to ensure audiences aren't taking the film too seriously. We get references ranging from Star Trek quotes, to a faceless bounty hunter transforming into a Playboy Playmate, talk of Cujo, and the scene every horror geek remembers: the bounty hunter nearly transforming into Freddy Krueger. I know I'm not alone, but I really wanted the transformation to finish - I mean come on Bob [Robert Shaye of New Line Cinema] you really missed an opportunity here. By using humor, Garris crafts probably the best entry of the series. There were moments where the Crites would use funny expletives in the first film, but there surly wasn't a gonzo scene of them destroying a Hungry Heifer fast-food joint, or killing the Easter bunny, or creating a Crite ball the size of a house and attacking a town. Thank you, Mick Garris, for making Easter bearable all these years.

******

Best viewing of the week. Every short film has been a revelation. In total we've seen 11/15 of the Oscar nominated shorts. I'm not going to choose one of those; although Opera, Two Distant Strangers, and Colette would be high on that list. The Easter movies were fun. I'm really glad I've finally seen Palm Springs, it was more than I had expected. But who are we kidding, we know the honor of HIGH this week goes only to:

HIGH:  GODZILLA VS KONG

Worst viewing of the week. I love that in the same week I saw Marty and George McFly along with Biff Tannen (April Fool's Day). I should have thrown in an Addams Family and Howard The Duck screening and I could have had the whole cast of Back To The Future in my week. Instead, High School U.S.A. has to haunt me.

LOW: HIGH SCHOOL U.S.A.

TV CORNER: